This semester has not been an easy one. When they tell you about nursing school people use words like- stressful, intense, exhausting, draining, and impossible. I hate how negative the world of nursing school has become. Entering into the program, I already had convinced my self that my experience would be the same. I would be miserable for two years until I finally graduated and became an RN. 

The first two weeks I let this be my mindset. I let the negative thoughts take over. In turn I was exhausted and stressed and overwhelmed most of the days. Instead of focusing on the new relationships I was forming with my new professors and classmates I focused on just getting things down and the lack of sleep I was getting. 

Today I am choosing to change. I am choosing to look at this whole experience as a positive one. I am choosing to focus on the wonderful relationships I am forming, the skills I am learning, and the chances I am getting to touch lives. I am in no way saying that there won't be stressful days, or nights, or times when it seems there are not enough hours in the day to complete it all and get sleep. But I can choose my attitude and who I set my focus on.

 Jesus Calling for today was perfect and reminded me of our Sponsor Lisa Carr who passed away after battling cancer for 7 years.  I met her my freshman year and she completely changed how that year went. Unfortunately our bible study ended after her cancer returned but she was the sponsor for Pi Theta Phi and I also looked forward to talking with her at meetings. One thing she always would encourage us to do would be to take our thoughts captive and point them towards God. We have the ability to focus on God. He will guard you and keep you in constant peace, as you focus your mind on me. Seriously how awesome is that. When we are in times our turmoil, in grief, in stress, he is there. He wants us to come to him with our trials and lean on him for our comfort and peace. I know Mrs. Lisa is singing and dancing with our Lord in heaven. Finally pain free. My heart hurts for the fact that she is no longer on this earth with us. I will miss her gentle spirit and the way she knew just what to say when we were hurting and broken. She was a little piece of heaven for every person that knew her and her presence will be immensely missed. 

From now on I hope to make my posts more encouraging. More focused on the positives of Nursing school and not the negatives. I want to keep the focus on God and how he sustains me thorough this process of completing my degree. 

- Kelsie 

The Start.

The time has finally arrived. That's right, I am officially a Nursing Student. I completed my first week full of orientation, 150 page syllabi's, new teachers, and already a few tears. That's right I have already become overwhelmed and a bit stressed but all is well. 

On Tuesday we had a transition ceremony. This ceremony focused on the start of this new journey we were about to jump into. They spoke of the relationships that would be formed with our professors and other Nursing classmates. How during the next 2 years we would grow. We would become stressed, overwhelmed, and at times lost in a sea of paperwork and nursing diagnosis'. But it would all be worth it.  We made our way to the front of the room and our professors stood as we lit the candles given to us. To signify the lights we would be. The lights in a world that is sometimes filled with darkness. A light to our patients. 

Going out into the world with a Christian mindset. To do no harm to our patients. To take the time to pay attention to each patients needs or fears. There will be times when they need a hand to hold or someone to laugh with. I can not wait for these days. To serve HIS kingdom everyday. 

Tuesday I being my first rotation of clinical. Chronic then Psychology. Next year I will begin with Acute and OB. I am so excited to start this adventure. One that leads to that RN next to my name and hopefully a job in hospital. 

Pre insanity

I love these first few weeks of school.  Why? Because I still have a social life. My mind is not yet completely consumed by stress and anxiety over classes, projects, and tests. 

This past weekend I got to enjoy two events plus a leisurely day of football and studying. 

Friday night consisted of a football paint war 

Who wouldn't want to spend 3 hours throwing paint on each other while playing football. It was a great night. Even though it took me an hour in the shower to get all the paint out of my hair. 

Saturday consisted of college football and the white county fair. You can not go to Harding/ live in searcy without attending this event at least once. We went with Eric's sister and her husband. We spent the evening consuming gross amounts of fried food, playing typical fair games, and ended up winning 3 gold fish. 

Soon though the papers will pile up, clinicals with start, and my mind will slowly start slipping away. For now I'm enjoying these nights. Hopefully they won't completely disappear here in a few weeks. 

I love my school

I can't say this enough, I love my school. Now it hasn't always been true. I absolutely hated this place my freshman year. I surprised a lot of people by coming back as a sophomore, but I did. I am so thankful I stuck it out. 

I have met some of the most wonderful people here. People who would drop everything to help me. People who challenge me to live for Christ. People who encourage me to stay positive and always do my best. People who are intentional with their relationships. 

A lot of these people came from my club. Pi theta phi. Yeah I knew it's a weird Greek name, but welcome to harding. We do things a little differently here. These women have been the biggest blessing in my life. They have been my safe place to go when it feels the world is caving in. My shoulders to cry on in bad times rand friends to rejoice with in good times. This week marks the start of the pledging process for our new members. I can not wait to see what wonderful girls we get to join us this year.  Here's a picture of my roommate from last year and I at our first open house. We pledged together last year and she is just wonderful. 

The 5th semester

Junior year has begun. I feel like the last 2 years have absolutely flown by. How can I be halfway (well 2 years and a semester) away from graduating. That much closer to the dreaded NCLEX. But also that much closer to my goal, my dream, becoming a nurse. This summer and past semester were both challenging ones. Full of hard conversations, tears, and finding myself. I look back on who I was when I first started this process. I have grown from an awkward insecure freshman to a more confident and independent person. I have made friends with some of the most amazing people. People who challenge and uplift me. People I hope to maintain friendships with the rest of my life.

But enough about my personal life

School has begun. Papers, tests, and projects have already been assigned. My First validation of the semester is out of the way and I am already feel more confident in this class than I did last semester. Repeating a class is never fun. And at times its embarrassing. But its not as uncommon as your might think. Science classes are HARD! Figuring out how you study and manage your time is a task in its self. Unfortunately I had to fail a class (or two) to figure it out. In the past two years I have learned that I have to say no. This is not something I am very good at. I love being involved with things. I love helping people and being there when someones in need. Which is all very good but at times I have to say no. I have to put my school work first, put my self first, and buckle down. I love what I am learning about. I love learning how the God made the human body to work and how we can use science to fix it. I can not wait till I actually get to put all this studying and late nights to use. But until then, Ill keep studying, I'll keep validating and stressing, I'll keep changing old peoples diapers and giving bed baths. One day it will all be worth it. When I have that RN next to my name.

Summer, well almost

I have offically ended my shophomore year of college. Crazy to think I am about half way done with getting my second diploma, the one that actually matters. While classes for the semester are offically over, summer for me has yet to begin. I was able to go home for a weekend but returned after finals to the wonderful town of searcy for a two week intercession course. World lit, 8-12 every day. Luckily Eric was taking a course as well so we get two more weeks before parting ways for the summer. Him to Ohio, and I to Texas.
On a nursing school related note! I passed my Final sinulation! That was one of most stressful things I have done. While that was a big accomplishment I have offically decided to postpone nursing school for a semester. Instead of starting this fall, I am reataking a course to get a better grade and a better understanding of whats to come in nursing school before diving in.

Heres some pictures of my semester!

Easter sunday 

we made a random trip to little rock and found a small fried pie shop. So good! 

My first Pi Theta Phi formal

We took a day and went to the memphis zoo and I suprised him with Grizzlies Tickets! My first big basketball game. We had a blast

Two of my very best friends got engaged this semester. Eric and I helped plan and take photos of the engagement. And yesterday I was asked to be the maid of honor for her wedding next summer! I am so excited to see how God shapes their lives together!  

This semester has been extremely busy. I may have put a little to much on my plate but so far I am surviving! This semester I decided to help choreograph a club show for my school with my room mate. This is a three month commitment of 5-10 hours of practice a week plus show week (which I just finished yesterday.) Having that on top of clinical work and my other class work has been a challenge. I have lost a lot of sleep and spend many days running from the library to practice and somehow finding time to eat in between. I have had such an awesome support system through this all. My family, boyfriend, and friends have been so encouraging and helpful when things have gotten to hectic. But now that spring sing is over, its time to focus on school. Oh yeah- I have been accepted to my University's nursing program!! Thats right! As long as my GPA stays up and I take a few classes this summer I will officially be a nursing student this coming fall. I am so excited to begin this next stage of my education and really get into the program! That is all for now. Time to catch up on homework and get my clinical paper work all together!!